Grandma 'Pat'

My Grandma recently passed away on Christmas Eve, but really, we're all very happy that she is not suffering and is in a much better place (um, hopefully). These are actually a few funny stories about Grandma Pat.
First of all, when she was younger, all of the kids thought her name was Patricia, instead of Lucricia, so most people called her 'Pat'. After years of making vain attempts to correct them, she finally decided that it wasn't worth the trouble and she was fighting a losing battle. "The hell with it." She thought. "Let them call me Pat, or Patricia." So, I always knew her as Grandma Pat.
She moved from Pennsylvania to Alaska with her husband Sam, who was one of the first U.S. Marshalls, Territorial Officers (before Alaska became a state) and Alaska State Troopers. They we're the unltimate of the "Greatest Generation". Truly, I think I would only listen about how to skin a goat from someone of this generation and stature. Let me explain.
10 years ago on a Friday night, I was at Grandma Pat's house in Wasilla, AK (no forever cursed at Palin Country) and one of her neighbors (when I say neighbors, I mean a crazy, back woods living, unshaved individual who deliverered his own children, packed in his own water and raised his own animals) brought her a goat to eat. Now, the goat had to be skinned, and I was volunteered by Grandma. She had me hang the goat on a hook from the ceiling by it's ankle, then explained is detail about how to properly hold the knife, where to cut and how hard to pull the skin.

I was slowly starting to get the hang of the process when a friend of mine, Mike Rich, called me on the phone (the kind with a cord that peole used to have) and asked if I was coming into town (Anchorage) that night. I said "Sorry dude, I'm in the middle of skinning the goat." "Uh, Chuck, I don't want to know." He said. So, from thenceforth, "skinning the goat", as it were, is now the new "metaphore".



Also, as the new year approaches, I always remember what Grandma Pat used to tell us about our first meal of the new year. "Never eat things that come from a chicken, becasue a chicken always scratches backwards, and you never backtrack or make the same mistakes you did last year." Instead, she told us "Eat the pig, because the pig always roots FORWARD!"
So, no eggwhites tomorrow for me. Only ham, sausage, hot dogs, pickled pigs feet, & split pea soup from Elaine's kitchen.
 
Grandma Pat lived a great life to the ripe old age of 87.  When everyone was together for Thanksgiving this year, there were 5 generations at the table.  Amazing.